One Week In.

I’m going to attempt to give credence to my foray into online dating, one week in. Here’s a list of surprises that I didn’t expect, should have expected or hadn’t thought out:

 Marrieds.  Bad relationships, swingers, cheaters.  Online sites offer a plethora of people looking for diversion.  I give credit to those who are up front about their relationship status, but it’s not my thing.

 Poor Grammar. Typos.  All. The. Time.  Ghastly.  Did 90% of the online population fail high school English? 

Stupid Handles.  SlowHand, PotBurner, WhyNotHookUp, BushPilot (okay, maybe that one’s legit, but I have my suspicions after having read his profile). 

 Bait & Switch.  Profile reads one way, messages appear to have been written by someone else. 

 Speed.  Presumed Rejection.  You can quickly message someone. Seriously rapid deployment.   Despite your best efforts to be witty and flirty with a guy, he’s not always going to respond.  Some will, some won’t, so what, move on. 

 Stop, Too Much.  I don’t discount a boy who asks, “how are you” in an initial message. You don’t want to shoot your wad before you’ve figured out if the girl’s going to respond.  It’s not something I do, but I get it.  The opposite floors me: Boys gushing about love, going on and on about looking for love and how they like to love and all they want is love.  All right already.  I get it.  

What to Say Next.  This is my next big challenge.  I’ve got a dialogue going with someone and then hesitate as to what’s the next best thing to say.  Too much, and I’ve given up precious information I’d rather not share.  Too little, and I risk being cut off.   It’s weird and I’m working on it.

I’m actually pleasantly surprised at my limited experience. It’s not as scary as I’d made it in my head (isn’t that almost always the case?).  Tossing myself into the dating pool has provided me incentive to take care of myself (or at least think about it before I have one more helping of pie), to be authentic and recognize I’m not some middle-aged has-been with no future for a boy in her life.   At this point, the dialogue has all been online, and that’s okay.  I’m not ready for my close-up.

Plunge-a-rific, or Awk-ward?

I've just taken the dive into the online dating pool.  Five years after ending the lengthy relationship with my daughter's dad, it was time.

I've been setup on blind dates by my friends.  Never anything horrible, but I do remember when my friend's husband asked, after a setup, if I thought the guy was gay.  Really?  Blind dates have fizzled out, and I want someone to go to dinner with, take in a movie and, yes, have an occasional hook up.  Yikes, did I just say that?

Right now this is less than 24 hours old.  I've already recognized its addicting appeal.  It's hard not to respond immediately to a man's missive (well, sometimes it's not, like when he calls you "dear" in his first email, the message includes typos and his profile seems a bit nuts).  Guess I should check out The Rules before I delve too deeply into this foray.

I'll be posting updates here, as I have to let it out somewhere. As much as I feel giddy, I also feel exposed and vulnerable.  Blech, I hate those last two descriptors, but I have to be pragmatic.  

Stay tuned.